Why Didn’t You Tell Me?

I love pictures. My family knows that, so they’re used to me constantly getting candid shots at events. I spend so much time behind the camera that seeing myself in photos can be jarring.

My undergraduate graduation picture is just one such example. Despite my initial reluctance about going to college, I managed to graduate. What a joyous occasion! So, I anxiously awaited my official graduation picture. I wanted to see a visual representation of my achievement.

Boy was I disappointed when I saw the picture. I could not get over how fat I was! I turned to Bible Study Mama and exclaimed, “Why didn’t you tell me?!?!” As a general rule, my family is VERY outspoken. I don’t have to ask for opinions because people offer them freely. But I couldn’t recall hearing anyone saying that I needed to lay off on the fries recently.

Really seeing myself pushed me into action. I couldn’t deny that I had completely let myself go. I didn’t ask for help or input. I got to work.

I worked out six days a week faithfully. I planned my meals ahead of time. That picture fueled me. I was relentless. By the time I went on my first ever cruise that August, I had lost thirty pounds. I was the poster child for “Hard Work Makes Winners.” Unfortunately my enthusiasm didn’t last.

As graduate school began, I found myself with increased responsibilities to squeeze into the same amount of time. It didn’t take long for my health to be placed on the back burner. I had my eyes on a new target.

Have you ever been frustrated when you find yourself way off track? Have you hit the end of your rope and wondered why no one seemed to help prevent your fall? I find myself in that place more often than I care to admit. It’s easy to do when we’re not focused on the right things. When our priorities are so out of order.

We need community to point us towards our destiny. To take pictures of us and help us see ourselves before it’s too late. If you feel that there is no one in your circle that can correct you or help guide you, you may have the wrong people surrounding you. Or even worse, you just may be the problem.

None of us are perfect. Although it pains me at times to admit it, I know that I’m not always right. When we deny ourselves the opportunity to exist in community, we deny ourselves of the opportunity to really live life. Don’t say I didn’t tell you. #wepreach