A Moment That Changed My Life…..
I can think of many life changing moments: getting married, giving birth to my son, beginning my career as an Accountant; however, there is one that sticks out more than the others. And quite frankly, that moment hasn’t happened just yet or it’s still happening. LOL!
My husband and I have been trying to conceive since December 2015. We’ve both gone to the fertility doctor, and there’s absolutely nothing wrong. On the morning of April 4, 2018, I woke up with the song “Be Still” by Yolanda Adams in my spirit. It was awkward, because I hadn’t heard that song in years. From my recollection, I think I was a little sad that morning too, so I asked God to do something very specific for me (just like Gideon in Judges 6:36-40). I said, “God, if this is your way of soothing my spirit and encouraging me then the scripture that my Aunt Nancy sends today (she sends one EVERYDAY) will be Psalm 46:10.”
About an hour or so later, I got a text message from my aunt and my heart was racing, I opened the text and it read “Be still and know that I am God” Psalm 46:10. I sat at my desk and cried. I’m sure if I was at home I would’ve shouted. After gathering myself, I made an Instagram post, because I wanted to remember the specific date to share it in my testimony. I’ve stood on that promise of God since that day.
However, it hasn’t been easy because, honestly, it put a strain on our marriage for about 18 months. My husband and I have argued over “be still and know that I am God.” Unbeknownst to a lot of people, Ian isn’t biologically my husband’s son. In fact, my husband doesn’t have any biological children. Hence, the strain on our marriage and my husband’s anger! However, I trust God’s will and purpose for my life. I’ve learned to trust God’s “not right now!” (That’s another testimony/blog in itself) Every time I feel myself getting a little perturbed (I am still human) God will send Psalm 46:10 as reminder.
He did it recently. On the morning of my 34th birthday, Aunt Flow showed up and I wanted to cry. I asked God, “Is it okay if we try insemination?” Thirty minutes later, my aunt sends her daily text and you know what the scripture was: Psalm 46:10! I cried and thanked God for always being right on time. So, even though I haven’t given birth to her yet, this trial, valley, lesson or whatever you want to call it, is definitely changing my life.
I’ve realized that I’m actually stronger than I thought I was, that my love for God is so deep. I will fight anyone about Him, and I understand what it means to be longsuffering. Most importantly, I know without any doubt, the faith I have, God gave it to me, and I remind Him of that every chance I get. #wepreach
